I have often said it is a privilege to come out later in life after much therapy, coaching, unlearning, and becoming. It is a gift to step publicly into my entire being without shame and live from a foundation of being grounded in heart, mind, body, and soul. It is also a privilege to have an ex-husband and adult children who have held space for me and offered me mercy for mistakes made along the way. Don't mistake any of this for my saying it has been easy. On the contrary, there were years of sleepless nights, anxiety-ridden inner monologues, numbing, and pain.

Each Enneagram Type has a Defense Mechanism, and for a Type 8, it is denial. Type 8s must be strong, we cannot be vulnerable, and we use denial to keep the whole structure in place. Coming out was insanely liberating, and there are no words to articulate the rest, freedom, peace, and joy of living authentically. My personal work with the Enneagram began as a way to circumvent coming out, but quite the opposite occurred. I thought becoming more self-aware would allow me to accept my circumstances, but it lead me to accept myself. I remember my teacher Peter O'Hanrahan saying one day in training, "Self-awareness cannot outpace self-acceptance." The more I understood my patterns, became compassionate toward myself, and worked to loosen the narrative I had clung to for most of my life, I chose to be vulnerable, and it has changed my life.

That choice also brought massive changes to our family, and we are committed to loving each other as we navigate moving forward. I would not be who or where I am without the deep love, forgiveness, and care, I have received from my ex-husband and beautiful children. Obviously, an Instagram post doesn't offer the space to deal with the myriad complexities and struggles which have and are playing out, but know that we are choosing love.